Superconscious

Change is the only constant and yet it is something many of us have resistance to. How can we harness the energy of change to work for us? 

For many attachment forms to the familiar and comfort zones develop. Often times when we are in a comfort zone we can just be going through the motions rather than consciously making choices about what we want to create in our lives. The waves of change come and can knock us off our feet. A master is someone who takes any situation no matter how bad it seems and changes it into better than if it never occurred. No matter what waves roll into your shore you have a choice to how you internally and externally respond. Change is driven at the level of choice.  

Change is happening at an exponential rate. Look at what has unfolded in 2020 – unprecedented change. It is a vital time to be awake and aware of ourselves. Change relates to the energies of necessity and opportunity. When you encounter change what energy do you relate to? When we are deeply in a comfort zone it can mean we miss the call of our soul and what we are really wanting. Ignoring and repressing it to the point where we respond out of the energy of necessity rather than opportunity.

Imagine your true self / higher mind wants to tell you to make a change and it can use a metaphorical feather, brick or bus. For instance, you feel called to make a change in your life’s work but are in a comfort zone in your career. First you may get a feather, a little voice inside that says perhaps I could explore this type of work. If ignored you make get the bus which could turn up as an illness, an accident, getting fired and if this is still ignored duck because you may just get a huge cosmic kick up the butt. Perhaps we have received a collective kick up the butt? It’s a matter of choice. 

Two exercises I suggest to enhance your ability to work with change are:

1. Contemplate what you want. What do you really, really want? Imagine it even if it is just for a few moments. One day I was at a Cacao ceremony on a rooftop and one of the women was cold. She kept talking about how cold she was for around ten minutes. Her partner said, “Close your eyes for a moment and imagine you were warm.” She did. A few minutes later a new person arrived and had a spare blanket. Coincidence? Matter of choice. Personally, I don’t think so. Either way, give yourself a break from ‘being cold’ whatever that is for you and take a few moments to imagine ‘being warm’. Tell your subconscious, “I choose to be warm”.

2. Do things differently. My mentor Paul went to see his teacher one month expecting a profound assignment. He told him to go away and tie his shoelaces differently and come back in 6 months. Experiment with doing things differently – tying your shoes differently, take a different pathway home, wash your body in a different order, brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand and observe your state of being. 

Get in touch with your experiences and questions and enjoy the journey.

What does relaxation mean to you?

Perhaps it is having no where to go or nothing to do. Perhaps it’s spending time with loved humans or pets. A day at the beach or amongst trees.

Relaxation is a natural state for us to be in. However, it is not always normal. Many people are in a chronic state of fight or flight and in great need of relaxation. 

Consciously you may think you are relaxed – (“I’m fine”) – but subconsciously or unconsciously you are in fight, flight or freeze.

Kind of like Marge thinking she is sitting on the couch.

Our autonomic nervous system subconsciously put us in one of two modes ‘rest and digest’ (parasympathetic) or ‘fight, fight or freeze’ (sympathetic). This is ancient programming because fight, flight or freeze would save us from predators  back in cave man pre fire days (think The Croods) and when the danger past we would be free to sit around rest and digest our food. This would happen automatically we would get flooded with adrenaline so we could react. It happens without thinking. A small version is when you think a stick is a snake or your hair is a spider. It happens to our bodies before our minds know.

When we are stressed we don’t sleep well, eat well or feel very creative, chronic adrenaline prevents these natural inclinations. These days we don’t have literal predators but perceived and real dangers that can lead to disease in the body from chronic stress.

We do have choice in this though. We can become more aware of our bodies, our emotions and our subconscious. Breath is one of the major bridges between our conscious and our subconscious. Breathing happens subconsciously the majority of the time. Breath is a clue to how we are feeling. If we are breathing shallowly or rapidly it often indicates stress. 

I would like to share one quick technique with you. It only take 1.5-2 minutes and will do wonders for you physically, mentally and emotionally. It requires you to consciously turn your attention to your breath.

It’s called 3,3,6 breathing.

• Sit or lie in a comfortably position.
• Fix your gaze on something just above eye level.
• Take a deep breath all the way into your abdomen, bellow your belly button (rather than chest breathing).
• Breath in through your nose for the count of 3, hold for the count of 3 and exhale out your mouth for the count of 6. Repeat 3 times.
• On the third exhale, you may close your eyes, if it feels good stay in that relaxed state for a few moments and when it feels good internally count to 3 and open your eyes.
• Go about your everyday life feeling more refreshed and relaxed.

This technique physically gives your body the message to relax through the stimulation of the Vagus nerve.

I suggest doing it once in the AM and once in the PM. And by the way, it totally counts as a meditation if you are wanting to have a daily practise. 

We live in a world of duality but also of spectrum and continuum. Often masculine and feminine energy is associated with gender but every woman, man and non-binary person has an individual makeup of their own personal energy.  

Often when we think feminine we think woman and when we think masculine we think man. There are also all these definitions and meanings around what men are and what women are. There are a lot of limiting beliefs floating around our collective unconscious about women being crazy or men being arseholes. Many people have grown up hearing ‘men only want one thing’ that limits a natural flow of connecting on mental, emotional, physical and spiritual levels. Many people regardless of gender want a deep connection and many people regardless of gender want a purely physical connection. 

It is interesting to contemplate qualities of these energies. Maureen Murdock writes about qualities of light and dark feminine and light and dark masculine. She includes light feminine qualities such as being nurturing and creative and dark feminine as chaos and manipulation amongst others qualities. For light masculine she describes holding space, being assertive, making choices and dark masculine as being domineering and aggressive. 

As human beings we are constantly in shift and what we feel and express can be different day to day and moment to moment. What is your current balance of masculine and feminine energy? Is it showing up in its light or dark forms? What would like to develop and explore more? I have been working on drawing in light masculine energy to give more structure and assertiveness to my morning routine. 

We can find balance internally between our energies or in our partnerships wether they be romantic or professional. It is valuable to have balance. Globally, we are out of balance. This world has seen a denigration of feminine energy for eons and it is my hope that we will as a global community move towards more balance of these energies. For example, to have a triple bottom line where the social and environmental is just as valued as the economic. Where we can have intelligence and growth but be in harmony with the earth.

 It is much like enjoying a beautiful cup of tea where the cup represents the masculine energy and the tea represents the feminine. A cup without tea is empty and tea without a cup is just hot liquid all over the floor. We need to use our logical minds and our imagination in life to create effectively. Our logical, conscious minds relates to the masculine energy and our subconscious and imagination relates to the feminine. When you want something you use both parts to effectively achieve the results you desire. I have work with many athletes and artists to create peak performance using their conscious and subconscious and the results are incredible. 

Self Hypnosis

This is a powerful tool that can be utilised to enhance any area of your life. It works with relaxation techniques to stimulate alter states of consciousness and with the power of suggestion.  We are more suggestible when we are relaxed (or in trauma but that’s another story). Think of suggestions and relaxation this way if you are relaxed your mind is like a still pond you can drop a pebble in it and it makes ripples. When we are stressed our mind can be like the ocean in a turbulent storm or even a squall. You could chuck a whole building in and it wouldn’t effect the water.

Suggestions can come from ourselves or others. They can come from language, image, music, subtext and more. Self hypnosis brings awareness to the ways in which we are communicate to ourselves on deeper levels and why this is happening. Let’s take could and should as examples of words and there subtexts.

Could vs should

I should get up at 5am

I could get up at 5am

What is implied with these statements? How do they make you feel? Often shoulds make us feel less than or not enough and could imply choice and wanting.

I would like to make a suggestion that every time you hear yourself think or say should replace it with could just for a day or a week and see how that goes. It is an upgrade that feels wonderful. It takes away the shame and self judgement as motivators and creates choice and encourages making decisions towards your ultimate goals from a place of wanting to create something rather than wherever your should comes from.

Where do your shoulds come from? Mum? Dad? Guardian? Teacher? Culture? Religion?

Where do your deepest desires come from? True self / individual spark or spirit?

Do you ever say things to yourself that you would never say to a friend? Especially when you don’t live up to your own expectations? Have you ever noticed scenarios where you give advice to a friend that you don’t follow? Many of us inherently have more kindness, patience, empathy for friends and sometimes strangers than we do ourselves. 

It’s common to have an inner critic judging the self as better than or less than. The truth is we are no better than or less than any human. Part of the human experience is a drive to improve that often creates harsh criticism. There is often a belief if we are too kind to ourselves we will become indulgent, lazy and unmotivated. 

The research shows just the opposite. When we are harsh on ourselves our cortisol fires we get stressed and overtime depressed and don’t want to do anything. When we are kind and supportive we feel more connected, in tune and in touch our serotonin and feel good chemicals fire and we are more likely to create. 

3 exercises to develop self-compassion:

1. Treat yourself as you would treat your bestie. Imagine having a coffee with yourself and telling yourself what is going on wether in relationships or in creative or work projects. Respond to doubts or judgements with love, kindness, empathy and patience. 

2. Awareness / Mindfulness – become the neutral observer in your mind. For example if you notice yourself doing something ‘wrong’ say hmmm that’s interesting. Become curious as to what is going on for you rather than telling yourself you are bad. Ask yourself what am I really wanting or needing here?

3. Get off the better than or less than see-saw. If you notice you are feeling better than or less than go hmmm that’s interesting and remind yourself you are no better than or less than anyone. You have inherent worth and you matter just because you are human. You are a creative being so why not focus on what it is you want to create in life. 

Photo credit: Marlon Alves 

The opposite of unity includes polarity, stress and fear which has peaked in recent times of enormous change and fear in the global community in the last few months. Sometimes you may become more away of what separates us than what unites us – a ‘us vs them mentality’. People have different beliefs of what is wrong and right and how we need to operate. Often times people can comfortably adopt a live and let live attitude but what happens when the stakes are raised? It is easy to walk across a 200cm long x 50cm plank of wood when it is on the ground but when it is 3m, 30m or 300m high it gets increasingly scary when the consequences of the fall increases. I do not know what the answer is. What I do know is we are going through times of incredible change on a global level.

Imagine we all live on an island and there was a red button. Some people believe if we push the red button we die. Other people believe if we con’t push the red button we die. Both people have research and studies that support their beliefs. People are angry and scared. Families, friends and communities divided. 

How do we come to peace, remedy and resolve? How do we act as a community and avoid judgement and competition? How do we respect each other when we all love the baby (the baby could be health, the earth, peace)?

Respect contains re/spect re = again and spect = look. To look again, to look deeper. How do we look deeper into one another when we are sacred? How do we find what unites us in that moment? I practise respecting and accepting others and their beliefs even when they are different. I have been taught to listen and to open to all possibilities even if they are not probable. 

There are many dimensions to the human experience, those of form and those of formlessness. There are many paradoxes. I have trained over many years to involve myself not only in the outer world of human experience but also the inner worlds including meditation, day dreaming and dreaming at night. To explore places in my consciousness for fun, creativity and peace. 

What is it that unities us? Our earth and our free will connect us as humans. We each have the ability to make choices. My wish is that we are able to make choices for ourselves that feel true for us with harm to none. I do not know what that looks like at this moment of time when the current reality I am seeing holds so much division. 

What I do know is often the only way out is in. At times when it seems impossible we can imagine something new for ourselves, our families, our communities. Taking time to do our best to relax and breathe through it. 

There is a saying it is always darkest before the dawn. My wish for you at this time is relaxation and peace. I invite you to do the meditation to find a light in the darkness and welcome the dawn. I dream of new beginnings with more unity and recognition of what it is that unties us. With more practises that look at the social and environmental and not just the economic which has been dominating the bottom line for a long time. I vision that we find ways to work with each other and the earth that brings forth more harmony. Again, I don’t know exactly what that looks like but I am meditating on that and I invite you to join me. 

Breath can be both a subconscious and conscious activity. When we are not thinking about our breathing it just happens subconsciously. One of the many things our powerful subconscious minds are controlling. However, if something goes wrong with our breathing or if we choose to focus on it it becomes a conscious activity. 

Breath reflects our emotional states which we may or may not be aware of. When we are worried we often hold our breath and when we relax or release stress we often let out a sigh or sometimes a yawn. In times of stress people tend to breathe more shallowly and times of relaxation more deeply.  Sometimes we only become aware of what we are feeling because our breath becomes noticeable. 

We can choose to focus on our breath – to consciously relax our mind and body which is beneficial for health and decision making. (It’s much easier to think clearly when our body is not tense and ready to fight or flight). It is common practise in many self development and healing fields to use breath as a portal / doorway / bridge to relax the body and induce an altered state of consciousness. This state can be utilised to create more communication with subconscious eg in meditation, dream states or hypnosis. This can be used for extracting or implanting subconscious knowledge. Having awareness of our conscious and subconscious minds and getting them to work in alignment can be used for healing and for becoming more focused on your goals – what you are creating in life. When our two hemispheres work together we have whole brain function. 

How is your breathing right now? There is so much happening in the world at the moment. So much unprecedented change and stress. The potential dangers to our environments and lifestyles can create a lot of stress in the body. One way to respond and not react to the current climate is through working with your breath. It is not the whole journey but a powerful step.

There are so many breathing exercises and techniques that are so powerful. I am looking forward to sharing an ancient Tibetan breathing practise in the Self Mastery Retreat coming up in August. I have been waiting to share this since 2011 and have never had the right moment. So excited. I will give more details about that in the next newsletter. 

In the meantime I would like to share three breathing techniques I highly recommend – 

Firstly, 3,3,6 breathing, this technique is used to stimulate the vagus nerve. You breathe in through the nose for the count of three, hold your breath for the count of three, and exhale out your mouth for the count of 6. It is important to breathe deeply all the way down to your abdomen. It is also helpful to focus on one spot while doing this exercise it enhances the relaxation. 

Secondly, box breathing, this technique has being famously used by Navy Seals in stressful situations to help regulate their nervous systems. You breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts, breathe out for 4 counts, hold for 4 counts and repeat for 4 rounds.

Thirdly, shoulder breathe release, breath in pull your shoulders up to your ears and hold then let your shoulders and breath go at the same time with a big sigh. Do this three times or as many times as you want. 

Breath is a constant in our lives from our first breath to our last. I suggest working with the bridge of breath to consciously create with your subconscious utilising whole brain function to be more healthy and empowered in your day to day life. 

Often times we set out to make changes but lose focus or ‘fall off the wagon’ of our good intent. We may think we do not have enough time, money or knowledge. But is that really true?

I would like to remind you we have both a conscious mind and a subconscious mind and when they work together we can create more powerfully, achieving and enjoying our goals. 

Our conscious mind relates to the directive and active parts of our mind. It is able to direct our thoughts and make choices. It is a valuable tool for delivering information about the outside world and for doing things. Our subconscious mind relates to the receptive part of us and relates more to feelings, dreams, deeply held beliefs, and holds the record of everything we have experienced with our five senses. It is a valuable tool for accessing deeper knowledge about ourselves and for being present. 

These two minds communicate differently and can conflict. If that happens the subconscious mind has more power so it will win.

Say, you decided consciously, no more coffee in 2020. You are at the cafe waiting in line thinking I am going to order a green smoothie. Yep green smoothie for me. Year of health. Yep, yep, yeppers, green smoothie. Then to your surprise you ask the waiter for one coffee please.

So what’s going on with that?

Perhaps you hold a belief from childhood I am a failure or I can’t do anything right yet you have forgotten that you believed that or you think it doesn’t have any power over you until you sabotage yourself. It could also be that even though you consciously want health subconsciously you have a payoff to keeping yourself unhealthy.

In EFT we call this secondary gain. 

One simple way to start to integrate the conscious and subconscious is to think about what you want, formally choose it (by saying it aloud or writing it down) and then imagining it (which activates your subconscious). Make your imagination as vivid as possible engaging at least 3 senses (eg touch, smell & taste). Keep an eye out for my next email when I will take you through the lemon experience which is an exercise to see the power of your imagination and subconscious.  You can signup to my newsletters at the bottom of the page.